从《二泉映月》到《赛马》

此文写作于2015年,应公司的“家风故事”活动而作,个人觉得还是不错的。

我的父亲,一辈子清贫。

父亲是一个普普通通的人民教师,没有可歌可泣的丰功伟绩,只是简简单单教书四十载,但也是桃李满天下,春风遍人间。

十八岁的他高中毕业后回乡成为生产大队的记工员,那时候的农村是集中式作业模式,每户按照出产时间记工分,而父亲是当时大队里面唯一的知识份子,面对一群用手指都数不清数字的朴实农民,父亲拒绝了某些村干部不出产而记工分的要求,坚持按原则办事。所以他的记工员仅仅只做了一年,在下一届生产大会上被人顶替,村里唯一的知识份子和普通农民一起生产劳作。我曾经问他后悔吗,他说:靠双手劳动吃饭,踏实!

二十岁那年,村里按乡镇的要求建立了小学,父亲通过层层选拔,成为那所小学的校长。那时候的办学条件非常差,乡里除了给一间破旧的祠堂挂上了××村小学的招牌加一块黑板外,其他的东西全靠父亲亲自置办,他花了一个月的工资为学校买了一本《现代汉语词典》, 没错,那就是当时唯一的课本,到处东拼西凑借来一些残破的桌子板凳,就这样,一所小学就开张了。那时候上小学并不是免费的,乡里派人下来收完学费后就扬长而去,有几个孩子交不起学费,每天只能趴在窗户外,眼巴巴地看着教室里面,风雨无阻。父亲看不下去,让他们回家搬来桌椅,请他们进教室和其他同学们一起学习。几年后,乡里的办学经费终于下来了,翻新了教室,添置了桌椅,然而父亲因为没有收几个孩子的学费,没能继续留任校长。用他的话说,他当时的心情就像是把自己亲手养大的孩子送给别人一样。听到了这些故事,我也问过他后悔吗,他说:那些孩子朗朗的读书声一直在他心中回响,若再来一次,选择如初。

其后几十年,父亲作为一名普通的人民教师,从小学到初中,从初中到小学,教过语文、数学、历史、音乐、绘画等各个学科。当年的我,并不能够理解他所谓的原则与坚持,父亲才华横溢,琴棋书画样样精通,特别是拉得一手好二胡,当年快弓、跳弓、拨弦、颤音的技巧堪称县里一绝,理应不该如此落魄,任人差遣。在我看来,如今蝇营狗苟的社会中,父亲就像终年推动着巨石的西西弗斯,与周遭格格不入、迂腐而可笑。

和那些胸怀梦想而又自以为是的青年人一样,我带着不以为然和不可一世来到北京去追逐理想,然而一切并不像想象中那样简单。光怪陆离、纸醉金迷的世界不断腐蚀着我的三观;喧嚣、浮躁、雾霾压抑着真实的自我;纷繁而芜杂的问题、指责、刁难还有沉疴,晃得人眼花缭乱;三十而未立的我在毫无防备的情况下己成人夫,为人父,茫然不知所措。
身心俱疲的我回想起当年父亲的所作所为,恍然大悟。父亲从来没有正面回答我是否后悔当初的决定,而是在用行动在证明并不后悔所有的一切,虽然他的物质生活演奏的是一曲辛酸而凄凉的《二泉映月》,但他的精神世界里却是一曲奔腾激越纵横驰骋的《赛马》。

在别人眼中,我的父亲并不是一个伟大的人,但留下的足迹却是我远不能及的大写的人字。退休后的父亲经常提着二胡在公园里面演奏那两首曲子,远远地看着满头白发的他,我发现有很多东西是可以传承的,也是值得传承的。
而我,会成为他。

原创文章,转载请注明: 转载自飞月秀

本文链接地址: 从《二泉映月》到《赛马》

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